Locked in Silence

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This ain’t about me, this is about that brother who is terrified of his demons. Too scared to write or talk about them. He lays in his bed at night weeping not knowing what to do next, wondering why his life is the way it is. Cursing at the mere thought of his creation, contemplating suicide because his life doesn’t seem worthy.

He tosses and turns all night because the love of his life got cancer and there is nothing he can do as she fights for her life. The doctor said the possibility of her living is 10 – 90. Too afraid to face the fact, he breaks down in tears each day. Sleep and food is something he cant afford anymore. He cant talk to his family about it cause they don’t see the beauty he sees in her. His friends alienated him because they deemed his girl not worthy.

Enraged, hurt and baffled, he contemplates suicide each passing day. His laughing stock too many because his skinny and everyone seems to think his sick.

Lost in his world he turns to God and there is nothing he can say but curse at him for all that has happened in his life, regretting why he was put on this earth to suffer, given strange friends, handed candy only to be denied later. “Why Why Why??” he screams to the heavens as tears roll down his cheeks, wishing God would speak back to him.

Broken, he walks to highway hoping to jump in front of speeding car. Scared but determined, he takes a few trolls forward and waits for the right moment. Amidst his panic, he witnesses an accident which leaves a cyclist’ legs shuttered. Rushing over to help he realizes how lucky he is to still be alive as the cyclist breathes his last.

He may have been baffled, lost and living in worry but he found his voice at the right moment. I may not say what you want to hear but there is light at the end of the tunnel no matter how bad the situation seems. Take courage and face your demons, life is not a walk in the park its filled with bumps, some huger than others. You may blame God for what you going through but as the saying goes, God doesn’t give us battles knowing we won’t triumph. There is greatness within each person you just have to find yours and believe that.

 

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